Paint4Peace Class- " A Hug"

On Friday we taught 3o plus wonderful children from the Ralph Holden Community Center/Central Falls Artis. As always the class was wonderful as the kids ( age 6- 14) experience the joy of Painting4Peace. Each and every class is filled with special moments but sometimes they come in the simplest form and on this particular day it was an impromptu hug from a 10 year old boy as he left the class. Another reminder of the significance of the power of the arts to make a difference in someones life.
The Peaceman

What its Like ( i cant remember that face)

Sometimes I think I'm going crazy. My illness preys on the things I value most which is so often the special time with my family. The quiet moments(painting with my daughter, practicing soccer with my oldest, reading a book with one of my kids, playing rescue heroes with my little guy, talking with my wife)the small things that most people take for granted, but someone who suffers from OCD like me cherishes. Last week I was away with my oldest son for a few days to visit my parents in Florida which was a magical opportunity to enjoy our time together. And believe me it was so wonderful, but mixed within this time, I was trapped spending countless hours trying to visualize a meaningless face and could not let myself relax until I came up with it. I came home and told my wife, as it is both embarrasing and inconceivable that someone could waste as much time and energy on something this ludicrious. To have such anxiety associated with something so absurd....Wow....But hey that's the reality of the illness and I'm not running from it and not scared to talk about it.

PeaceLove Studio- Grand Opening

In an evening full of satisfying moments for the PeaceLove Organization i wanted to share the most memorable of those moments that crystallizes all the good that PeaceLove is and can be. Their is a young women who today works and exhibits at peaceLove who like me is a sufferer who reached out to us after seeing me speak at the State House earlier in the year. Our opening was the first major showing of her work of which she sold some that evening ! But what i cant get out of my mind and i will always remember is looking at she and her husbands beaming and proud faces that evening knowing full well the journey they had been on. I get emotional just thinking about it as her success story epitomizes all that i dream that our organization can do for people like she and i who suffer from mental illness and find relief in the arts. As if the satisfaction wasn't already enough i received a note the next day from her thanking us and telling me that the evening had been one of the best nights of her life ! Pretty incredible stuff

Peaceman

Paint4Peace- story

Over the last 2 days i have taught over 200 children our paint4peace program at Moses Brown School, a leading college preparatory school located in Providence R.I. Needless to say it was a hectic couple of days running around but a refreshing reminder of all the good that can be done with our program. At the outset of our classes we outfit the participants ( in this case children between 4- 15) with PeaceLove shirts that they wear as smocks. I like to have a little fun with them by asking them why they wear the shirts which they always answer "so we don't get paint on our clothes" but i never have anyone get the answer to the 2nd reason why. Yesterday for the 1st time a young girl in the 5th grade shouted out the answer " because it's cool ". She was right on as i tell people if you look good, you feel good and if you feel good chances are you are going to paint something good. Seems pretty simple but that's it.

Have a great thanksgiving,

The Peaceman

What It is Like (story #1) NYC

I was recently having trouble getting to sleep when an idea for a new addition to my blog came to me. I thought it might be helpful to try to describe to people what it is like to actually deal with an illness like Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. The particular nature of OCD, along with other mental illnesses, is that it can appear to be nonexistent to those who don't live with it. This translates to the idea that while on the outside a sufferer may appear "normal" or seemingly "fine", he or she may be tormented inside. I think I, along with the millions of others who live with a mental illness on a daily basis can understand what I am talking about when I say we learn how to hide our true emotions on the outside in order to function in our daily life, whether it is during a good day or a difficult one. This at times can be the most challenging part of the illness itself. My goal as part of this blog is to try to help people attempt to understand these attacks and how they can affect people like myself.


Story #1

I recently had a meeting at Deutsche Bank in NYC. It had turned out to be an incredible opportunity to speak about their potential involvement with PeaceLove Studios. I was fortunate enough to meet with an executive that was enlightened about the power of the arts and all the opportunities it has the ability to present. Needless to say, as I was leaving the meeting I was pumped with excitement and enthusiasm. Unfortunately, my illness seems to feed off robbing me of my peace of mind during these seemingly perfect moments in life. As I walked from their offices to my hotel on an absolutely beautiful spring-like day I should have been enjoying and relishing the moment but instead I was plagued by anxiety over something that had been said in the meeting, while simultaneously trying to remember something trivial that was spoke of in the presentation. This eventually led me to Macy's, where they happen to be debuting their stunning holiday window display. Rather than enjoying the aesthetics as well as the mood, I stood there frozen as the only way I can compare the anxiety I felt is with that of a parent who has lost their child in a busy airport. That is the anxiety I felt over something absolutely ridiculous, and the worst part is I knew it!!

A few days later I was watching the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade which was being broadcasted from that exact spot I had stood frozen with my thoughts. It made me really stop and think about how powerful and real these attacks and illnesses are to the people who struggle with them.

I hope this helps.

peace of mind

Peace of Mind - how can one possibly put a price on that ? Believe me you can't. Just ask someone like myself who suffers from a crazy mental illness like OCD that takes you out of the moment with unwanted and ridicolous thoughts. And to make matters worse it seems to always take on it's greatest momentum when you least want it as the disease trys to play the role of the thief and robber. At the end of the day trying to take from you those "moments" which are often so simple in nature but what in facts amkes our lives so special and meaning. coming off a weekend at home with my beautiful wife and children where i fight to enjoy a game of checkers with my 4yr old, a football game with my 9 yr old, or listening to my daughter practice the guitar. That is what Peace of Mind really is so never take for granted these small moments in your life because it is what people like myself treasure the most.
Jeffrey

Tough Fight but can be won

Tough couple of weeks for the peaceman as my OCD has played havoc on my mind. Hard to figure but probably a combinantion of all those things ( stress, anxiety, lack of rest etc.. ) that are difficult for people who suffer from my illness but that i seem to take head on in my day to day life as refuse to have it beat me and keep me from doing anything. Just one guys way of dealing with it > hope it might help others.
PeaceLove
Jeffrey